Friday, July 16

Hi baby.

I miss you.
 
A lot.
 
And I miss talking to you, but I'm afraid to call because I'm worried you're still upset with me, even though I dont know why we are "fighting" or whatever it is this is. Lately, it feels like we fight more than we dont.
 
I wish that would stop.
 
I miss you. I miss us. And I miss the man I fell in love with, because I know that this time apart is changing you and affecting you, just as it is changing and affecting me.
 
I feel like I'm becoming more of a "hard" person, like I'm less compassionate or just always borderline irritated. And I think that rubs off on you, or you feel the same or I dont even know anymore. I  hate not knowing, I hate not being able to read you, and i hate not being able to see you or your expressions or your face, because thats when I know youre serious or not-- its in your eyes. And when I can't see you, when I can't look into your eyes and see the man I love, I feel like I dont know you as well as I should-- even, that I don't know myself as well as I should.
 
And its killing me.

2 Comments:

Blogger Yours said...

Hi baby, i am not angry, like 10 minutes after these things happen i can't remember what we were "fighting" about. these things are just eruptions of frustration on the part of both of us. I miss you soo much too baby, i miss you a lot, i can't say the reason we do this, and i don't know the way to stop it, but i know in my heart that if we can be together this would go away, i know you know me and i know you can read me through my eyes and that is one of the reasons i love you soo much, you can see my true emotion without me having to say a word, and it just sucks that we can't be together because that is why we can be together forever and we can be together all day everyday, because you can read me, and i am sorry because i know i cause a lot of this because of my attitude and my frustration and i am definetly not handling the situation the best way it could, and i am sooo sorry, but please dont ever hesitate to call me, i would much rather talk to you and just resolve the situation or figure out what is going on. I always love you, and i can sit here and try to be angry and i can't, i just think about you and us, and the anger goes away, and i just feel stupid and stubborn, and i love you and then i get scared to call you, because i don't know when i can and stuff and i know that is just an excuse but it boils down to the fact that i am truly sorry, and i absolutely love you with all my heart and i will make a sincere effor to try to stop these things from happening...

I Love You, and i miss you,

bye sweetie

7/17/2004 1:50 AM  
Blogger Fishy said...

haha, youre afraid to call me, and I'm afraid to call you. Wow, we are good. only us. Seriously.

7/17/2004 4:22 PM  

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